Even though her head looks like something Jason and the Argonauts have to cut off to find the Golden Fleece, Audrina Patridge knows that she should always stick her insane body in a bikini and just stand there. I’m not really sure what else she should do. She could invent a time machine or develop a mutant power and “that chick with the big tits on that one show” would still be in her obituary.
Disclaimer: This article contains mentions of cannibalism and sexual abuse. Reader discretion is advised. In a recent Instagram video, Armie…