Jesus, what is up with Demi Lovato’s hat? Let’s move on from that. Here’s Candice Swanepoel in a bikini because Candice Swanepoel was specifically born to wear bikinis and lingerie and make it difficult for you to act excited when your girlfriend comes home with a Victoria’s Secret bag. Awww, look at her sitting over there trying so hard. Now pat her on the head and tell her she looks just as good as those skinny models. They’re way too skinny for you, you don’t even think that’s attractive. What does she eat, birdseed? LOL! You like a woman who can eat and have a beer. You love a woman who isn’t wrapped up in her physical appearance and is more focused on her inner beauty. Say it just like that. I mean, you have to, because it’s not like Candice Swanepoel is gonna come by and make you sandwiches and do your laundry now is she?
Disclaimer: This article contains mentions of cannibalism and sexual abuse. Reader discretion is advised. In a recent Instagram video, Armie…
