A Very Important Interview With The Iron Sheik

by Katie Mathewson

The second we found out that semi-retired Iranian pro wrestler, The Iron Sheik, had a Twitter account, we prayed that it was really him. Sure enough, the 73-year-old legend is a diligent — and verified — tweeter. What does Hulk Hogan’s former opponent say in 140 characters or less? Well, sometimes the Sheik asks his 321,000 followers to support the IndieGoGo campaign he’s created to fund a documentary about his life and career (or else “go fuck yourself”). The rest of the time, “The Legend” impresses us with his pop culture savvy and his very strong opinions on celebs from Drake to Alex Rodriguez. Naturally, we wanted to know who he thinks is “the real” and who are big time “jabronis.” Read our interview to find out straight from The Iron Sheik himself.

KATIE: Sheik, we love how involved you are with pop culture. Even more than that, we love your opinions on who is the real and who is a jabroni. In your humble opinion, who are the 5 celebs who are the MOST real (AKA your top 5 favorite) and why?

THE IRON SHEIK: THANK YOU INTELLIGENT KATIE LADY. YOU SHOW ME YOU ARE THE REAL LADY PRINCESS DIANA YOU ASK ME WHO IS THE REAL.

The people who are the real to me:

1. The Willie Geist

He is the real new Matt Lauer. He new generation he respect the old generation and he know that I can beat the fuck out of the Piece of dead dog shit Geraldo. He never cross the legend that way I love him forever.

2. The Roseanne Barr

She queen comedian. She love the legend. She know I sold out Madison Square Garden and I love her but never have sex with her. God bless her.

3. Rob Thomas, the Action Bronson and the Riff Raff

Both the musicians they know who I am and they know I come from oldest country in the world and if I want my words like the music. I forever love them like the Frank Sinatra.

4. Steve Howey from the Shameless

He have the sex with black woman on show and he happy that way still I respect him. He good friend of mine and I he #teamsheikie.

5. Anthony Bourdain

He make the food he make the world news. He know who is the real gold medal. He know what I can do. I know what he can do. He like the Jesus. He the best.

KATIE: As a follow up, who do you think are the 5 biggest jabronis (AKA the celebs you hate the most) and why?

THE IRON SHEIK: Easy question:

1. A-rod

He dumb son of a bitch jabroni mexican lowlife son of a bitch. He pretend not to do the medicine. Everybody know he have mouse dick and he act like he real. He worse than the ultimate warrior. Fuck him.

2. Amanda Bynes

She dumbest bitch in the world. She look worse than dead dog and she deserve to get camel clutched. Forever go fuck yourself.

3. Chris Brown

He is another lowlife piece of shit no good motherfucker. He beat the woman everybody in the world should know he is biggest douchebag. I hate him and his music worse than dead dog crying. Fuck him and his father.

4. Justin Bieber

He think he Elvis. Not yet. Till now he panic he not ready for hall of fame. He deserve suplex on driveway of my house.

5. Wale

Whatever the fuck his name is. He talk shit about my brother the David Otunga. He think the wrestling not the real. Tell him and his midget dick to come see me and I break his face with my boot and make him humble so he know what real is.

KATIE: We’re very excited about “Iranian Legend: The Iron Sheik Story.” Tell us what made you want to create this film and what you think people will love the most about it.

THE IRON SHEIK: My movie going to be the best. I work hard all my life and now I show the people how I come from oldest country in the world to live the America dream. This way I know if you love the legend and you know why I talk with the heart and tell the people how I feel. You see why and how I become the legend and forever be the greatest.

I’m the legend. I always be the legend. You support me even on my store www.theironsheik.org and I love you. Otherwise go fuck yourself forever.

Top photo via Sportz Wiki, bottom photo by Noel Vasquez/Getty Images

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