Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve just got a little more… old. When Ryan Seacrest and friends awkwardly usher in the ball drop in Times Square with hours upon hours of canned, safe corporate-humor and soulless gleaming grins, Billy Joel will be the first singer to welcome 2014 when ABC airs Joel’s New Year’s Eve concert at Brooklyn’s Barclay Center at five minutes past midnight.
Joel will join Macklemore & Ryan Lewis, Miley Cyrus and Blondie on the New Year’s Rockin Eve broadcast, which was out of touch and sad enough with Dick Clark at the helm. Now with uber-douche Ryan Seacrest running the show, it’s perfectly within reason to expect that nobody at all will tune in for this big-box nonsense.
“This should be one of our more memorable new year’s eves,” says “New Year’s Rockin’ Eve” executive producer Barry Adelman, presumably while making hand gestures resembling putting a gun in his mouth. “With Miley Cyrus at 11:40 pm and Billy Joel at 12:05 am it should be a great great night.”
Let that sentence sink in.
Beginning at 8 pm on New Years Eve, hosts and talent across a spectrum of taste and ability will stiffly ring in 2014. Daughtry, Jason Derulo, Fall Out Boy, Florida Georgia Line, Ariana Grande, Jennifer Hudson, Enrique Iglesias, Robin Thicke and the Fray will all perform in Los Angeles, while Fergie (the meth Muppet from Black Eyed Peas) hosts from Tinseltown. Meanwhile, Seacrest and everybody’s favorite vaccine-hysteria inducer nitwit Jenny McCarthy will be the hosts in Times Square.
Despite the fact that the mix of performers has less cultural gravity than a Now That’s What I Call Music! album, “Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve Part 1” was watched by 22.2 million total viewers last year.
