Teacher Arrested for DWI While Driving to School

According to KHOU, Patricia Almond is a teacher at Timberwood Middle School in Humble, Texas. Well, at least she was.

After she allegedly swerved and hit a retaining wall on her way to school last week, the middle school theater and arts teacher couldn’t act sober enough to prevent DWI charges.

Upon exiting her vehicle, officers said Almond was “disoriented, swaying from side to side, had bloodshot eyes and had the smell of alcohol on her breath.” Based on her mugshot, we feel pretty confident with that assessment.

We’re unsure if Almond’s lawyers will use the defense that she went too far in showing her kids what it takes to be the next Lindsay Lohan, but that might be the only chance she has at beating this thing.

Sadly, this isn’t the first arrest this month in the Humble Independent School District, as a teacher at Ridgecreek Elementary School was busted last week with heroin, meth and other drugs stashed in her apartment.

In the case of Almond, I guess sometimes you feel like a nut, and sometimes you just feel like getting wasted before 8 a.m. on a weekday and flushing your career down the toilet.

Here’s one guy who probably won’t be her replacement: Substitute Teacher Caught Masturbating on the Job

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