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There are so many things you have to worry about these days as a school administrator. Sadly, you have to worry about students bringing weapons into the building, kids putting Ex-Lax in the ranch dressing and of course, students at other schools making “crude jokes” regarding your mascot because its name sounds super close to the medical term for dick.
According to The Salt Lake Tribune, a concerned resident in Farmington, Utah has a big problem with Farmington High School’s choice of “The Phoenix” as its mascot. The reason for Kyle Fraughton taking issue with it? You guessed it – he’s afraid that kids at other schools are going to make fun of them by calling them “The Penis” or just “penises.”
No, seriously. In 2017, that is what this fucking clown is worried about.
“I looked on Google and a couple hits down I saw that the plural of phoenix was either phoenixes or phoenices,” Fraughton said. “I have no interest in my daughter or my son playing sports and getting referred to as something like a penis.”
Fraughton actually launched an online petition asking Davis School District to rethink its choice of “The Phoenix” as the mascot. Although Farmington High School Principal Richard Swanson says the word would remain singular and not pluralized.
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“We are one,” Swanson said. “We are The Phoenix.”
Of course, the best thing Fraughton could do to save his daughter or son from such “ridicule” is simply move to another city.
