Brian Wetterhaus has the same struggles of any man, but today we saw one he never expected to see at the ripe age of 29: getting stuck on the pot from looking at his phone too long. After about 65 minutes mindlessly scrolling Twitter hashtag #Disneylandfight, sending inappropriate DMs to girls with boyfriends and playing his Wheel of Fortune app, Wettherhaus found himself incapability of standing up from muscle atrophy. He spent another 45 minutes googling remedies for muscle atrophy, none of which proved useful in his tiny bathroom. With the help of an icepick, two tubs of butter an exercise ball, he was finally able to make it off the toilet in time to sit on his couch to binge an entire season of Stranger Things, realizing around the finale that he forgot to wipe his ass.
Cover: Andriy Onufriyenko / Contributor (Getty Images)
Mandatory Tweets: Twitter’s #WorstThingToDoDuringSex Will Light Up Your Day
Weird News Bundle 6-25-2019
-
Mandatory Weird News: Dog Steals Cop Car, Eats Officer’s Beef Jerky
Check out the story here.
Photo: aijohn784 (Getty Images)
-
People Smoked Cannabis Back in the Day to Talk to Ghosts
Check out the story here.
Cover Photo: Bestforlater91 (Getty Images)
-
College Student Gambles on Del Taco’s Vegan Burrito, Calls Home to Make Parents Proud
Check out the story here.
Photo: Artur Debat (Getty Images)
-
Woman Avoids DUI By Drunk-Driving Toy Truck, Proves Stupidity Can Still Be Original
Check out the story here.
Photo: Zave Smith (Getty Images)
