Do you remember that jerk that used to make fun of you in high school? He was the absolute worst person in the world. He wrecked your life for years, made you go to therapy and stunted your ability to make friends in college.
But it’s cool. You’re an adult now and, if you had the opportunity, you would take some serious revenge for your high school self. So, in honor of Grown Ups 2’s upcoming DVD/Blu-Ray release (coming Jan. 23 in Australia), we’d like to give you some payback suggestions.
Top 10 Pranks You’d Like to Pull on Your High School Nemesis
Top 10 Pranks You’d Like to Pull on Your High School Nemesis
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1. Hire an Actor to Arrest Him at His Place of Work
You need to tell the actor to get violent if necessary because he’s likely a law-abiding citizen and will probably resist being taken to jail for something that he didn’t do. Oh yeah, and, unless you actually want him to get fired, you might want to explain the prank to his boss before he sees his employee being carted away in cuffs.
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2. Steal His Mortgage Check Out of His Mailbox for a Few Months
This one isn’t as dire as it sounds. He’s not going to lose his house… Well, probably not.
Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images)
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3. Remove All of His Toilets from His House
You might need some help for this one because toilets are heavy and old ones can be really tough to remove, but it’ll all be worth it when you see him head out to his lawn and squat. For an added bonus, call the cops so that they catch him in the act of public defecation!
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4. Advertise a Major Concert at His House
Step 1: Go to Kinkos and print 1,000 flyers that list his house as the place where Snoop Dogg will be performing this coming Friday. Mention that there will be free beer. Step 2: Go to your local college or university and pay a couple of undergrads to post the flyers everywhere. Step 3: Sit on your porch and watch the hilariousness ensue.
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5. Go On His Xbox Live Profile and Scream Profanity at Children
Most people do this on their own Xbox live profile, so it doesn’t seem like a huge deal, but if you yell loud enough and you get creative enough with your profanity then you might be able to get him banned. And that means he’ll lose access to all of his downloaded games!
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6. Take His Car, Have it Painted Hot Pink and Return it to His Garage
This one is tough, but the payoff is pretty awesome. Getting a car painted takes a few days, so you should probably steal it when he goes out of town for the weekend. Make sure to get the most obnoxious color possible (pink is the best).
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7. Buy a Jukebox that Only Plays Miley Cyrus and Cement it Into His Living Room
If there is such a thing (which we sincerely hope there is not) you’ll need to buy a Miley Cyrus-spewing jukebox and cart it into his house. When you cement it down, you’ll need to make sure and use the heavy-duty stuff. You want him to have to completely destroy his floor if he wants to get that thing out of there.
Photo by Mick Hutson/Redferns
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8. Hide Speakers Throughout his House and, at 11:11pm, Start Playing Spooky Noises
Hiding the speakers shouldn’t be too hard. You can get it done while he’s at work. And while there are probably some pretty good pre-recorded “ghost” sounds that you can purchase, we recommend making your own. Nothing will freak him out more than a personal touch.
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9. Schedule a Play Date For His Kid and Your Kid…Then Leave a Ransom Note
Okay, this one might backfire, but it could also be hilarious. Just make sure that you don’t sign the ransom note with your own name. Seriously, not a good idea.
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10. Take a Picture of Yourself Naked in His Favorite Chair and Text it to Him as Soon as He Sits Down to Watch Football
This one is even funnier if you’re in the room with him, so try to get an invite for Sunday night and then text him right at kickoff.
Photo by Michael Stuparyk/Toronto Star via Getty Images
