More than the movie itself, we remember the overblown budget scandal. Reportedly costing about $175 million (the biggest budget in movie history as of 1995), the Kevin Costner-starring post-apocalypse thriller (it’s essentially The Road Warrior, but at sea) was notoriously difficult to film, having an enormous floating set that would sink into the ocean on a near-daily basis. As set after set needed to be built to replace each day’s previous disaster, the movie’s money just started spinning out of control. It didn’t help that big stars like Costner and Dennis Hopper received so much money. Many people I recall talking to were curious to see the film for the budget alone; they weren’t interested in the film’s story, but they had a sadistic interest in watching millions of dollars of studio money burn away in front of their eyes.
The big budget scandals have left a blot on Waterworld‘s reputation. “One of the world’s biggest bombs” often translates in the public consciousness as “One of the worst movies ever.” As such, Waterworld is often perceived to be an awful movie, not worth your time.
Well, CraveOnline‘s Trolling is here to save the day! We proudly rush to the rescue of the films that everyone hates, and everyone hates Waterworld. Let us sharpen our critical acumen (and boldly put ourselves in your hate zone) to openly declare that Waterworld RULES!
Here’s a few reasons why:
Kevin Costner’s heroic character is perhaps a bit too much of a cipher, and, uh what was the deal with the mutant fishman thing? And the conceit of a map tattooed on a young girl’s back, leading to dry land, is a little bit contrived, but perhaps it’s all in good fun. Waterworld is a decent and entertaining and elaborate action movie that can easily fill the hours on a Sunday afternoon, and can easily stand repeat viewings. Yes, it cost a lot to make, but that’s no reason to hate it. and here’s the kicker: Comparatively speaking, it didn’t lose all that much money. There are bigger bombs in film history that are actually deserving of your scorn (Look up the loathsome Town & Country sometime). Waterworld deserves nothing but love and support.
Until next week, let the hate mail flow.
Witney Seibold is a featured contributor on the CraveOnline Film Channel, and co-host of The B-Movies Podcast. You can read his weekly articles Trolling, Free Film School and The Series Project, and follow him on “Twitter” at @WitneySeibold, where he is slowly losing his mind.
Seven Reasons Why Waterworld RULES
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Salient Environmental Message
Waterworld takes place in a future where the polar ice caps have melted away entirely, and the Earth is now covered by an almost unending ocean. 1995 was the time when the environmentalist movement was experiencing an enormous surge, and concern for the planet's health was on everyone's mind. Phrases like “hole in the ozone layer” and “greenhouse effect” were being bandied about. In the past, post-apocalypse thrillers took place in deserts (possibly because of nuclear weapons wiping out all plant life, but probably because it was easier to film there). It makes more sense, though, that the world would flood, and that only canny sailors would survive. Invest in boats.
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Neat World
And what would this flood post-apocalypse look like? Like a tanned and soggy string of floating shanties and scurvy-ridden pirates, of course. The maritime living was really cool to look at, and even kind of alluring. On a planet covered in salt water, it makes sense that the most precious commodities are things like dirt, potable drinking water, and, rarest of all, flowering plants. Only the wicked people seek gasoline in this world. Rather than just setting the film on an ocean, it actually thought about how certain little things might function in such an environment.
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Unique Look
I liked the salt-stained clothing everyone wore, the gentle rocking of the sea station, and the general at-sea living depicted in Waterworld. The catamarans. The big rusted oil tankers. The bi-planes. The jet skis. There is something rollicking and pulpy about the visuals in Waterworld, evoking old-timey serials and adventure novels, but still providing us with something unique and new. Post-apocalypse-at-sea has not become a subgenre unto itself, and Waterworld – perhaps thanks to its budget – was never imitated. That means we have a film that is original and bracing. No other films are like it. That's not nothing, especially in genre cinema, which so often thrives on adaptation and imitation.
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Cool Villain
The Deacon, as played by Dennis Hopper, is a delightfully overblown madman in the classic Hopper mold. Sporting a bloodied eyepatch (like a proper pirate) The Deacon rules a tanker full of oil, controlling all the gas-powered vehicles in the world. He has a leathery bald head, and disturbingly shiny teeth. The sight of this ragged weirdo standing tyrannically on the prow of a giant, slow-moving tanker is an awesome visual, evoking an action movie pirate version of Captain Ahab.
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That Guy in the Tanker
I love this guy. So, the bad guys (called The Smokers, due to their penchant for ultra-rare cigarettes) live on an oil tanker, right? It turns out they have a Benjamin Gunn-type old man living down in the actual oil stores, bound to a small rowboat, rowing about in near-darkness, pushing through the sticky slime 24 hours a day. His job? Just to check on the oil, I suppose. This creepy, oil-dwelling skeleton is awesome. He has a squeaky voice. When he sees he's likely going to die, he utters “Oh thank God!” This is a guy that Lovecraft would write a short story about.
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Awesome Action Sequences
Areal bi-plane dogfights, chases at sea, oil-based explosions, diving and swimming, Gatling guns firing at planes, explosions. All of this stuff is awesome. Again, this is a film that banks heavily on pulp adventure imagery, and, well, that kind of stuff is catnip for action junkies. Any action film would benefit from the inclusion of a bi-plane dogfight. Why do you think people like Star Wars so much? It's got bi-plane dogfight scenes! They just replaced the planes with spaceships. Waterworld, by using real bi-planes, is therefore better than Star Wars. Yeah, I said it.
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That Awesome Universal Logo
Waterworld was distributed by Universal, whose logo, as we all know, is the planet Earth encircled by their name (debates about the “universality” of a single planet can begin now). The opening shot of the film is a doozy that incorporates the logo into the movie itself. I love it when Universal does that. We see the planet earth. We zoom into it. As the camera movies forward, we see the ice caps vanishing, and the continents being swallowed up by water. It's eerie and cool, and I love it.
