Holly Madison was in Las Vegas yesterday to set a Guinness world record for longest bikini parade. A Guinness World record. For a bikini parade. I only thought they did boring shit like the longest fingernails or the shortest game of Connect Four. Of course this is a completely asinine record, but hey, whatever it takes to get a bunch of chicks in bikinis. And for Holly Madison, she might as well be discovering a new element or unveiling her design for a new time machine, because after five years of being known for sucking the dust out of a reanimated Civil War soldier’s penis, anything would probably feel like an accomplishment.